Wednesday, 5 February 2014

Charles - a future King or a Cnut case?

Anyone know what Charlie actually said to the wet and drowning of the Somerset levels or even understand it as I presume he was speaking in Saxon English to complete this West Saxon rural idyll, trundling by tracker* and punt from island to island, following in the foot steps of King Alfred or maybe King Arthur. Most of the news clips are 'Mumble, mumble, mumble how unpleasant for you.'

I pondered if his PR team set up a 'cake burning opportunity' near Sheppy and are the anvils and furnaces of Athelney once more ringing and singing to the sound of Saxon blade making while the monks in Glastonbury raise voice in the Benedictus?

Maybe he simply said:

"I'm sorry you have all got very wet ... but you lot did vote for Cameron's Tories - so what did you expect? Miracles?

Between you and me I think the Cameron is over promoted and just a bit loopy; as for his friends, the Gideot or that foul Golom like IDS creature with his 'Yeeeessss, my precious' as he steals more money from children and old folk, well let's say they are not my sort of people.

Please do not tell the press or the local Tory MP in Wells I said that.

Look, the bottom line is; as potential King I can do Sweet Fanny Adams because if I do it will be interfering with the Government you supposedly elected, not my fault - see, you 'elected them' but I am really sorry if you are all that extremely wet......" hence the mumble, mumble stuff.

More like King Cnut unable to stop the tide flooding on the levels rather than an Alfred leaping in defence of his people against the raping and ravaging Tory politicians. We can forget any King Arthur comparisons; dashing and heroic is something, our Charlie is not. I certainly do not think Anne in the Ygraine role would be interested in incest with her brother, no matter how powerful it might let her become.

(I wish I hadn't written that, that is an unpleasant image that is going to stick with me for a while - I apologise to readers, this may be an ironic image too many for you as well).

* 'Tracker' as in the Somerset ditty - "I can not read an' I cannot write but that don' really matter wen I'se drivin' my tracker." In the process normally creating a tail back from Wells to Glastonbury.**
** I lived in North Dorset for 17 years where they had girt biggle trackers.***

*** girt biggle tracker = great big old tractors

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