Monday, 9 June 2014

Unionist Lemmings head for the cliffs ...

We have had a series of relaunches, of relaunches, of previously launched Unionist campaigns this last week. Better Together's 'Honest, you'll get more powers, if you vote NO' Alex Douglas-Home's 1979 retread. United with Labour (aka we hate Alisdair Darling more than Wee Eck campaign) and their 'We agree with Better Together (sort of, maybe, aye mostly, when you come to mention it) but hate agreeing with the Tories (and Alisdair Darling).' line. Somewhere near the cliff edge there is the tiniest squeak from the few Libdem lemmings left, so dispersed by the cliff top wind of Scottish public opinion you almost can not hear them but if you are very quiet you can hear, 'We agree with what ever the other two have said.'

Yes, last week's revamping and 'up gaming' of the No Campaign in all its diversity and mutual hatred came up with, 'Youse jist cannae dae that, jist dinnae, 'cos we're telling youse tae naw goan dae that.'

Inspiring, is it not?

As these Unionist lemming factions head for the cliff edge, not just content to split the Better Together campaign, they are also continually squabbling between themselves within their own tribes. It appears the species Lemmus Westminsterii have a problem with leadership issues. The problem appears to be they all want to be leader, all at the same time. Unlike other species in the Lemmus genus this drive is not gender specific as females of the Lemmus Westminsterii species are just as likely to drive other males and females from leadership as their male counterparts. For the observer this is a delightful behaviour to watch as the Westminsterii species clamber over each other to be first off the cliff but for Lemmus Westminsterii there are serious draw backs in this internecine behaviour, not the least that none of them knows where the cliff edge is. This is clearly seen in the Scottish sub-species (Lemmus Westminsterii Scotiae) who have driven their larger English cousins (Lemmus Westminsterii Anglicae) to the same cliff edge with out the English species apparently knowing it, firm as the Anglicae species are in their stated belief there is no such thing as a cliff edge because they have banned all cliff edges, so there is clearly not a problem.

The real problem is in an attempt to stop the Anglicae species own suicidal rush these lemmings have come up with a cunning plan to outsource their own suicides to a different species in an attempt to balance the books - Hominus Paupertas.

According to observers of this phenomenon they managed to get 60,000 Hominus Paupertas to take their place in the first year alone (2011-12) and even more in successive years. The problem for Lemmus Westminsterii Anglicae is the Hominus Paupertas are no longer keen to take their place and have pointed out this is in fact illegal and contrary to the Anglicae's own laws on suicide written in 1961:

Procurement of a suicide is an offence under the Suicide Act of 1961, and the Act states that such an offence shall carry a penalty of up to fourteen years in prison.' (Iain Duncan Smith has, in spite of being given this information on camera (and a copy of the broadcast will be held in the BBC's archives) continued to enforce the Welfare policies which are causing the suicides.)

This is, of course a bit of a bummer as it now seems the Lemmus Westminsterii Anglicae can not now avoid going over the cliff they currently claim does not exist by getting Hominus Paupertas to go over (the non existent cliff edge) in their place.

In summary, the independent observer's choice is simply this;

Lemmus Westminsterii are heading for the cliff edge with an inevitability and momentum which is hard to see being reversed, no matter whether they believe there is really such a thing as a cliff edge or not. Whether we should feel sorry for these little furry rodents, with their venal, self interested and self destructive habits as they hurtle towards their doom, to seek to deflect them from their impending death wish as they squabble amongst each other, is one which always troubles any natural wild life observer. Yet in the end we must allow nature to pursue its evolutionary track and leave them be. It is, after all, their own fatalistic decision, choice and nature's way of ensuring the stupid and weak do not survive in order to maximise the benefit for the rest of the world's flora and fauna.

No comments:

Post a Comment